how to dress simple but stylish- elevating the ordinary in our wardrobe

how to dress simple but stylish

When you think of dressing as a lady, what comes to mind? It seems to be a dying art form to celebrate loveliness for loveliness’ sake! I’ll be honest, sweats have made too many appearances in our home.

And, we all know the sinking feeling on an errand hoping to not run into anyone we know, because we are a hot mess! Right?

Ladies used to have less choice in their ordinary, homemaking days. Often a housedress (for chores etc. ), a Sunday dress, and perhaps a few others for evenings.

With today’s lack of emphasis on dressing, we forget the power of a pretty dress. And, comedians have plenty of jokes about the outfits they see at a certain big box store, ahem.

Developing a simple but stylish capsule wardrobe makes things easier.

Curating a wardrobe changes you. Not WHO you are, but perhaps a bit of how you will present yourself. TO yourself. That is a beautiful thing, my friends!

Over the last two years, I have been greatly influenced by The Daily Connoisseur and Inspired by Nikki. Two ladies who live ordinary, busy, full, working-at-home mama lives. Yet, they have learned the art of dressing like a lady. And they chose that definition for themselves!

You can too. It is a powerful experience.  Let me tell you about an experiment I am doing…

This year my “word” is Elevate.

Elevate- to raise from a low or common state…to improve, refine or dignify…to execute, to cheer

Currently, I am choosing a style that will last for years. Seasons.  Choosing to elevate my wardrobe, raising it from its common state, and refine it. For me, I decided dresses will be the star of my closet.

I made a Poshmark closet to support this. This resource makes it easy to be patient and wait for what you really want! (If you want to know some thrifting tips, let me know and I can do a follow-up post).

My new wardrobe is 100% resale/thrifted.

Buying a nice quality item wasn’t really a purposeful option in my entire adult life, just a lucky find. It had to be your size, your happy thrifting/clearance day. That is going to change.

Ladies, it is possible to create a wardrobe that delights you. It doesn’t have to be fancy, new, or perfectly Pinterest. It just has to be curated.

That is the secret! A curated wardrobe stops being random and becomes intentional. You are worth it.

Proverbs 30:30 -Charm is deceptive, and beauty is fleeting; but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

What makes a simple outfit look good? The day the pants fell down

Let’s talk saggy butts. Too much too soon? 😂   I’m gonna be honest, pants never fit me right. I’m over it, some thing about hitting your 50s? We want things that we really like, that are comfortable, that make you feel beautiful.

Pants just don’t do it for me, I spend half the time pulling them up to be frank. My ancestral genes did not provide a lot of junk in the trunk.

But here was the clincher, recently I was at an event where I noticed that MOST women who stood up in the rows ahead, spent a long time pulling their pants up, pulling up the back of their shirt, and fixing it for all the world to see. We all do it.

But I’m over it. So I’m taking a drastic step. (Big step for a lifelong jeans and vans girl).

The pants are all getting donated except for one pair, I’ve got to wear something after all while I’m curating a collection of dresses. They need to be comfortable, feminine, and just as easy to wear as a pair of pajamas!

How to look elegant and classy every day (most of the time 😉

So, why I am doing an experiment? I am drastically reducing my wardrobe to be primarily dresses. That doesn’t mean all ladies wear dresses. It means this lady wants to for several reasons:

• How we look affects how we feel- (hope we don’t run into anyone). Why do that? Stacy London used to say “Looking nice needs to be just as easy as sweats”. Keep it simple
• Suffering makes you appreciate beauty- I have spent much of the last few years in bed, for health circumstances I didn’t choose. That leaves lots of reflective time to really cultivate beauty
• I want to live each day as a celebration- Just because it is Tuesday, or sunny, or the library book sale is a good reason to embrace the day with confidence
• Looking nice makes people smile- When we feel nice, it is the teensiest exchange and opportunity and the world a moment happier…because it opens the door for possible conversation where we can see people, and want to connect with them
• It is important to set an example to our children that loveliness is a worthwhile gift- for no more reason than life is precious. I told my girls that I didn’t do a good enough job teaching them the value of feeling beautiful for your own sake when you have nowhere to go
• I can only speak for myself, but sometimes I get a little bit lazy about being “comfy “at home. You know what I mean, the air-dried hair and holey sweats? Frump is fun sometimes, but not as a lifestyle. it’s a powerful thing when we stop doing that
• We don’t have to wait for the body to be “correct or perfect”– we are fine mamba jambas right now! Feminity is beautiful
• For me, it is a season of being able- If for you it is not practical for all, nor even desirable? that is ok! When I was a homeschool mom in 10 degrees below winter, a dress was NEVER on my radar. This is a different season of an empty nest. There is no pressure for what KIND of wardrobe you choose, but please choose one that feels lovely on you!
• Dresses are comfortable- girls, when we have to hoist our pants up every time we bend over or squat? Ugh, no more
• Men are visual- for me, my husband has had to put up with years of me being sick, and that means looks are often the first thing to go. I want him to know if no one else saw me? I think he is important. We can be honest about this! Yes, our partners should love us for who we are. And he does, but attraction is a good thing to cultivate, both ways. Especially in long term relationships

No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up- Regina Brett

How to look stylish at home with confidence

Be prepared for things people might say. Unfortunately, shifting to a more elegant look than jeans and T-shirts can invite some unwanted input. Remember, this speaks to their views…and does NOT reflect truth into your circumstances.

• Why are you so dressed up?
• Well aren’t you fancy…(thinly veiled insult)
• Aren’t you a little overboard?
• Vanity is sinful. Sure, but what about making the most of saying “Thank you God for my health, for eyes, for hair and movement” Do we judge our children when we see them twirl as little girls and feel lovely? God, I imagine, smiles down on us as HIS children

Once a family member told me I thought I was fancy for wearing earrings every day. I have worn silver hoop earrings for 30 years, at least. too fancy? I just like earrings :).

These speak to our cultural disintegration of fashion, classy, feminity, and becoming TOO casual.

I like old movies and suits and admire the long gone presentability of ladies and gentlemen. If you do too, there is nothing wrong with that. Sometimes though, it makes others uncomfortable when we change. That is not your responsibility.

Proverbs 30:26-  She is clothed with strength and dignity; she can laugh at the days to come.

5 questions to ask when you want to dress simply

See the photo above? The small section on the top shelf is what I am keeping of workout clothes, a pair of jeans, a pair of shorts, etc.

• Really take a good hard look at your closet. Jennifer Baumgartner says that the majority of people wear 20% of their closet 80% of the time. So look at those things and get reflective. Is it a habit? Preference? Fear? Delight?
• Simplify (I’ve been watching The Minimal Mom for a few years and BOY have I been encouraged). Be brutal and get rid of everything you don’t look forward to wearing. She even suggests a mom’s uniform if that is your season!
• Make a list of what you would like, so you can keep your eyes open. Don’t settle
• Determine what deal breakers are: length, fabric, cut, color. This is regardless of what TYPE of wardrobe you choose.  And speaking of color, check out this great article by The Simple Swan on choosing colors. I could so relate. My colors in all aspects always rotate back to pale blues and pinks and greens. And glitter…
• Why keep things you don’t want? Is it a scarcity mentality? I get it. For all my adult life I kept ALL the things because I knew I couldn’t afford to replace them. But, you can bless people who really would love what you aren’t using anyway. Let’s let go and be surprised by what God places in our path

How can a woman be stylish and well-dressed?

The joy of curating a wardrobe you love is a choice. Please, it is doesn’t have to be your choice today. Food for thought if you don’t have the bandwidth.

Overcoming means celebrating for me! Being feminine because I like it. This is my season.

Yesterday I showered and was excited… what do I GET to wear today? I don’t know if I EVER have thought that?  Plus, I have been sick with the plague for 3 weeks and am still not well.

I need this boost of normalcy. You know what? I put on the dress, then perfume, then earrings, and floated through the day looking for loveliness in all areas. Still sick. But not defeated.

Who knew we could do this? Jeesh, it took long enough. You are enough friends, today, right now.

You don’t have to go spend crazy, please don’t! Just have a plan.

Dress simple but stylish as YOU define it

So, what makes you feel beautiful?

I like edgy, vans, etc. Still me. But only one facet. Right now, flowing feels beautiful and I treat myself better.

I still would wear black leather pants (if i had them 😉 )  and stilettos ala Grease OR Vans and ponytails and hat. but right now, dresses. Those are not gone forever. We can edit without discarding the rest of us!

Girl, I am still Sandra Dee on some days, Laura Ingalls on others, and Rizzo from the Pink Ladies on other days. That is the freedom of being whoever YOU are. There isn’t a box.

That said, it is helpful to have a signature style for curating a simple living wardrobe.

What is an item that makes you feel beautiful? We know that our beauty comes from inside as women, but with the bombardment of cultural ideas and advertisements, it’s hard to remember that sometimes.

Celebrate you, the body you’re in today, the arms that hug your people, the legs that walk around for you and hold you up.

Celebrate it all, imperfect bodies are perfect, and we can dress in ways that embrace joy- not trends ❤️.

You are worth celebrating right NOW because you have a lot of roles in your life and if no one‘s told you lately? You offer so much that matters… And that’s beautiful.

Dress simple but stylish resources

• Remember that these are just suggestions. You don’t NEED someone’s approval to find your style! That said, it can be fun and encouraging to read about women who have curated a style they love!
• At Home with Madame Chic: Becoming a Connoisseur of Daily Life

• Slim Velvet Non-Slip Hangers

• The Lost Art of Dress: The Women Who Once Made America Stylish
• How to Not Wear Black: Find Your Style and Create Your Forever Wardrobe
• Ladies Like Us: A modern girl’s guide to self-discovery, self-confidence and love (Alena is unapologetically “tradwife”, just an FYI if that offends you. Personally, I loved it and she is super broad-minded and articulate)
• The Wonder Years: 40 Women over 40 on Aging, Faith, Beauty, and Strength
• Iris Apfel: Accidental Icon (this lady looks like so much fun!)
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