I’m not supermom, and this is not a museum
It isn’t easy being a supermom.
I mean, people expect so much of you. We expect so much of ourselves.
When I became a wife I wanted to do it all perfectly. My house would be clean and my husband would celebrate the day he lucked out with such a perfectly accommodating mate.
Hmmm.
When I became a mom I worked so hard to do it perfectly.
My kids would be always well-behaved, and if I worked hard enough, they would grow into beautiful adults that contribute broadly the everyone and everything around them.
Even more than that perfect mom and wife, I wanted to be Super Woman. In all areas.
Can we be an imperfectly perfect mom?
I tried. I failed.
Perfectionism has no place in real family life. We work harder and harder and one day we fall off the wheel in a slump. Injured. Our dream crushed.
Being a mother is about learning about strengths you didn’t know you had and dealing with fears you didn’t know existed — Linda Wooten
Living in an effort to do it all in our own power isn’t sustainable. I gave up and after much soul searching, realized being Super Woman isn’t all it’s cracked up to be.
Yes, I did “it” for a time. At a price.
When I couldn’t be super, there was no gray area. Super/Failure seemed to be the only options.
Friends, give it up.
We are super moms because we keep showing up
We are people that live and breathe and laugh and yes, make messes.
Not to say I don’t have some Super Woman qualities, they just might not have made super hero status yet.
I am Super Sensory: I mean SUPER, my sniffer can detect any unapproved smell for miles. One of my less appreciated traits in the family.
I am Super Mom: Not a perfect mother, and no one expects it. But ask my kids… they think I am pretty super. Quirky, fun, super. I’ll take it. And even with imperfect parenting, they are still growing into beautiful adults that care about others. Check!
I am Super Wife: I gave up ironing his shirts (sorry Grandma), I always forget he would appreciate a lunch, but he knows I have his back. Always. And I pick up before he comes home, never requested but always appreciated. It’s a good balance.
Not supermom qualities you probably possess:
I am NOT Super Everything To Everybody: I used to try very hard. I gave it up and now give what I can. That is enough.
I am NOT Super Able: What I often can be is super sick. It is a challenge living with chronic illness. You know what? My family had become Super Supportive. Incredible trade-off.
I am NOT Super Housekeeper: Though I do work, along with lots of help from my teens, to keep it tidy…it isn’t a museum.
How about you, do you think Super and Perfect are equitable?
Today I ask you to reevaluate your life. Choose what really matters and do that…
None of us can be Super Everything. Just be Super You.
P.S. If you need some inspiration and reading material to remind you of how important imperfect moms are? Check out these!
- Confessions of an Imperfect Mom
- Queen of the Castle: 52 Weeks of Encouragement for the Uninspired, Domestically Challenged or Just Plain Tired Homemaker (especially enjoyed this one for humor!)
- Midnight Mom Devotional: 365 Prayers to Put Your Momma Heart to Rest
- Find Peace: A 40-day Devotional Journey For Moms
- How to Keep House While Drowning: 31 days of compassionate help
- Not Just A Mom: The Extraordinary Worth of Motherhood & Homemaking
- Memory-Making Mom: Building Traditions That Breathe Life Into Your Home
- The Good Enough Mom
- Guilt-Free Mommy: Insights and Tools to Overcome Mommy Guilt
- Don’t Sweat the Small Stuff for Moms: Simple Ways to Stress Less and Enjoy Your Family More
- Disclosure: I only recommend products I do/would use myself. This post may contain affiliate links that at NO additional cost to you, may earn me a small commission to help support this blog. Read full privacy policy here.
I love this. All of it. It’s so true, we are super (at some things) and if we could only see ourselves the way our kids do, we’d be so much happier with the job we’re doing. Thanks for the encouragement today! 🙂
Meredith, appreciate your comment. Am glad you found encouragement here today
Thank you Christa! Very important, very true.
Welcome home Lotta! Glad you could make time to “visit” today 🙂
Love this.
La…your link is broken to your blog
Yes, my home is not a museum. Right now it looks like a play center, or an animal rescue. Great reminder that we don’t have to do everything.
Which is funner, the play center or the animal rescue?
I was downstairs in the art room looking around and thinking “this is a mess.” And yet, I remembered that good things come out of that room. Just like good things come out of us and we are messes ourselves.
I would say I am super at loving. I just can’t love my family enough. Good post, Christa, thanks for the reminder.
I used to make cookies and then be frustrated because the level in the cookie jar would go down. I guess what I wanted was eternal cookies. You eat one, and instantly it is replaced. That would be great with a house. You make a mess and presto, it’s cleaned up. Instead of the manual way.
Fantastic visual, I could immediately visualize what you meant. If you can be good at only one thing (and I happen to believe you are good at SO many things) loving your family tops the list friend
I love it. There are so many days when I will be happy to settle for “we survived this day” and the only “super” is how super mad I am that nobody will pick up their socks or throw away their wrappers. Whatever your club is, I want to be a member.
I yeah, I forgot I can be Super Mad or Super Impatient too. Well, darn, my post was too long to add those anyway 🙂 You can be an honorary member of any club I am in
Yeah – I’ve found another soul mate. Lovely to meet you – found you via Meredith at Perfection Pending and Darcy at So Then … Stories.
Great post and right on the money in my books. The best piece of advice a friend gave me was “your children won’t remember how clean their house was growing up but they will remember what you did with them.”
Hi Kelly, I am truly happy that you came by to visit! I’ll look forward to getting to know you
I would like membership to the club as well, please. And let’s all remember to be Super forgiving of ourselves. Only One is perfect and it’s not any one of us. 🙂
You have lifelong honorary membership