One small act of kindness can make a huge difference
One small act of kindness can make a huge difference
We pass hundreds of people on an average day. Sometimes, we even stop to notice them. Not bodies milling about, but human beings.
With feelings and challenges and triumphs.
The sad truth is we don’t like to see the homeless. It makes us uncomfortable. If you give a homeless man a burger…he might just want a smile to go with it.
A man caught my eye in a parking lot. Haggard, wearing a dark green sweatshirt with a gigantic tear at one elbow. Worn cotton, fluttering in the wind as he rode his beat-up bicycle past the cars.
A basket was tied to the handlebars, full. Dirty pants, giving full disclosure of the thin frame pedaling in the heat.
I tried to put him out of my mind. Not because I didn’t care about him, but because I DID.
And I felt helpless. If God would show me how to help him, if I could see him again and have an opportunity…
I drove into the McDonalds parking lot, swinging around the building into the drive-through. There he was!
Coasting past the lined spaces, staring into the windows. Here was my chance.
To do something. The only thing I knew to do.
The simple act of offering
I quickly made a U-turn, finding him parking his bike in the bushes across the lot. Rolling down my windows, I took a deep, scared breath and smiled.
“Good morning, can I buy your lunch today?”
He leaned towards my open passenger window, his filthy ball cap keeping long stringy hair just out of his eyes. “YES”.
“A coke. Large. A cheeseburger?”
“Sure, you wait here and I’ll go through the drive-through”.
I ordered us lunch, with a side of dismay.
Did I offend him, telling him to wait in the bushes? I was trying to make it easy. But did I make him feel less somehow in the process?
I could have invited him in to eat with me. I didn’t.
What is the right thing to do to help the homeless?
This is always a struggle. I mean, he IS a strange man. I don’t just go alone places with strange men. Duh.
It is a fine line, isn’t it? This desire to be safe in a world of evil. This conflicting desire to do right and see people with Jesus’ eyes. A fine line, one difficult to see.
I pulled up to him and rolled down my window. Him leaning from foot to foot by his bicycle. Me in my air-conditioned car.
Handing him his food, I asked his name. He waited for a second, “John”, he said cautiously.
Suspiciously.
“John, I will pray for you today.” I smiled and drove away. Not wanting him to feel uncomfortable.
Feeling like a moron, wishing I had better words. With teary eyes, I contemplated his life.
Struck with this powerful truth: we love to comfort ourselves with God’s promises in Jeremiah. He knows the plans He has for us…so many promises.
I am here today to speak on John’s behalf. God has promises for THIS man. Before he was born, John was knit together in his mother’s womb. God had plans for his life! He was, and is, precious to our Creator!
Did someone hold John gently as a child? Show him cruelty? Does anyone pace the floors at night wondering if he is safe, or has he been forgotten?
How quick society is to judge the homeless
To tell the homeless to GET A JOB, GET A LIFE. As if it was that easy. As if we don’t need a permanent mailing address and countless other details.
I am well aware that people work the system. Yet, does that give us the clear conscious to turn our back on those down and out? I don’t have the answers.
One thing is for certain.
We don’t need to have the correct words to say when we see the ugly, glaring face of desperation.
We can choose to start by simply speaking. To trust God to fill in the rest.
God will give you the right words at the right time. For it is not you who will be speaking–it will be the Spirit of your Father speaking through you (Matthew 10:19-20 NLT)
Resources to help the homeless:
- Under the overpass
- 50 Practical Ways You Can Help the Homeless
- Convenience kits
- Bulk care packages
- Hot hand warmers 40 pairs
- Disclosure: I only recommend products I do/would use myself. This post may contain affiliate links that at NO additional cost to you, may earn me a small commission to help support this blog. Read full privacy policy here.
Wonderful post. One thing I’ve learned in my experience with homeless is that caring and treating them like real people is most important. By acknowledging John and buying him lunch that day, you did something for him few would do. You gave him a few moments of caring and love. (And the boundaries of how you do that are important too). Again, great post. Glad you posted it even if you were afraid of offending.
My brother was homeless.
Thank you for buying that man lunch.
One thing I’ve heard over and over is how people will not look the homeless or other marginalized people in the eyes. I try to look them in the eyes and smile. I want them to know that I see them. A person equal to any other.
I really like what you said, Stacey. You look them in the eyes. That’s giving them dignity.
Being kind in an unsafe world. Trusting and sharing.
Christa what a great post, it reminded me of the homeless man that sat across from me and my children in the doctors the other day. He had no shoes and sooty feet, a well dressed woman sat next to him when he spoke to her I thought she would ignore him. She turned to him with the most beautiful smile and started a conversation. I smiled to myself because at that point they became equals two people from very different circumstances. Thank you for sharing this story we all need to reach out to those need.
I have learned that typically the homeless just want to be seen. They want to be heard and acknowledged. I know it takes courage to stop and engage in conversation. Each time it will get easier, and you will not feel as awkward. Keep up the great work.
I will pray for John too! and all those who are homeless for whatever reason!
Be Blessed.
Christa,
There is a thin line. Maybe it just seems thin from our side. I think to them it’s a wall. I worked at a homeless shelter. It started out being an 8 week assignment, I was offered a job and stayed for a year. At first, I was so uncomfortable. But, after a while I realized I could relate to the people who lived there much easier than house-dwellers. Perhaps because there were no pretenses.
Christa, thank you for posting this. Our pastor challenged us one Sunday to reach out past our comfort zone and engage with the homeless in our path. It was a life changing experience for me. Many times we ignore them because it’s easier for us. So glad you reached out. “I’ll pray for you” is a phrase that gets thrown around a lot, but it is the most powerful weapon in our arsenal, God bless you for taking time to engage with this man. Thanks for the share!
Great, Christa. John was blessed by you, and sharing your story has blessed us. Thank you.
Such a poignant, soul-searching, beautiful post. We all need a reminder to see those in hard cirumstances as people first and foremost, not as numbers or inconveniences loitering around, littering the streets and leaching the welfare system. And to view them with Christ eyes of care and compassion as you do here. You did the best thing possible under the circumstances. I’m sure that John felt all the better for meeting you, being spoken to with respect, given much needed food and drink and the spiritual sustenance of your thoughts and prayers. Thank you for sharing the story, Christa. It leaves us with the humbling thought of how we would or could respond to John and others in his situation.
Your asking the right questions, Christa, and responding in His love. Birds of the air, flowers in the fields, John of the street, all clothed, fed and loved. You brought that truth to life. Thanks for challenging me to do the same.
Beautiful story, Christa. I feel you did just right. It’s not just for yourself that you have to be careful; you have family and others who depend on you to be safe. Another perspective: if John had gone inside with you he would have been the object of many stares, and perhaps unkind comments. By meeting him in his own territory you acknowledged his need, and showed him you were ok being seen talking with him. You treated him with respect, not as a blight on the scenery. You walk with God, and you listen to that still small voice and are obedient. May we all follow suit!
Christa…very thoughtful post. When we were living homeless in our van for a few weeks with our 4 children, we got a taste of despair and hopelessness. Day after day eating bread for all 3 meals a day, selling stuff at the pawn shop to keep going…it’s a hard road. So glad you responded in love without judging the homeless man. It’ll be something he won’t forget. Glad you are listening to God’s voice…that’s what I’m trying to do more:-)
There’s a homeless man who sits outside our Trader Joe’s, raising money for a local homeless shelter. I’ve said hi to him for a long time, and recently noticed someone giving him food that they bought in the store. On my way into the store the next time, I asked him if he wanted something to eat. He said yes, and after some prodding, told me what he wanted (he didn’t want to impose). I’ve bought him food a few times since then, and I was telling my husband about him the other day when he asked me, “What’s his name?” This made me realize that although I was doing good by acknowledging him and giving him food, I wasn’t really *engaging* with him, as I didn’t even know his name! I’ve since found out that his name is David, and he earns his bed at the homeless shelter by being there in front of Trader Joe’s, raising money and awareness. Homeless people are just *people* who have lost their way somehow. They’re not worth any less than you or I, and they have a story to tell, too. Thanks for your post!! 🙂
I normally try and personally respond to comments. Today I am just overwhelmed with delight to read each of your stories. Let me just thank you here for participating in this important discussion, I appreciate it
Oh friend. They surely just want to be noticed and needed. They long for conversation and to hear their name. What a beautiful honest story. Beautiful!!!
Christa, you did just the right thing, recognizing “Christ in his most distressing disguise,” and giving him something to eat and drink. Bless you sister.
Great post Christa! Thank you for issuing the challenge for us to see the homeless and less fortunate as God does. Praying for God’s blessings on John.
Appreciate you taking time to read it Maria, especially in these busy days!
As always, Christa, you make me think! I’ve had a hard time struggling with the same thing that you do. I want to help in a concrete way, and then I feel like I haven’t said the right thing or done the right thing. I’ve learned that if we have the heart and the intention to do God’s will, He will make the words stick even if we don’t feel like they are the right ones. It’s a hard situation. I am convicted that I’ve never asked their name, but you bet I will from now on. Thank you, Christa, for helping us remember the person behind the circumstance.
Stephanie
Stephanie, I have a hard time following my own heart, even with this passion in it. I am in a place at the moment where homelessness is rampant, the truth behind a veneer of beauty. There are SO many people who panhandle for a living here it is easy to want to have a calloused heart. I will keep trying…
Thank you for this. My son, Jon, has spent the last couple of years in and out of being homeless. Not because home wasn’t offered to him, but because he either chose to not follow basic rules or because he felt he wasn’t worthy of a roof over his head.
He had two birthday parties this year. One at home with friends, and one near where all his homeless friends hang out – we made two birthday cakes, so everyone could have some. He had been working for awhile, so he bought tacos for all his homeless friends too.
Tracy, thank you so much for sharing such a personal thing. I bet those friends who don’t normally eat cake anymore were blessed
Oh my goodness, yes! My kids and I just did this for a homeless vet sitting outside a Fry’s grocery store last weekend! He was collecting donations for homeless vets — completely legitimate and okayed with the store. We gave a dollar when we walked in but my daughter wanted to give another as we left. When we walked out to leave, though, he was slumped over in his chair completely oblivious to everything — heat exhausted and tired, I’m assuming. My daughter put the dollar in his donation can but I felt a prompting to do more. We drove to the Mcdonalds in the same parking lot, which of course was jam-packed. My kids didn’t know what I was up to and hopefully gave their milkshake orders. When I ordered a #2 with a large fry and coke they accused me of going off my diet. lol I told them it was for the veteran and that I wanted them to give it to him. By the time we got back to where he was he’d gone inside to get a little food from the deli. The kids were crushed. I told them it wasn’t about the food but letting him know people saw him and cared. It’s easy for hurting or marginalized people to feel unseen. Our acts of love and compassion let them know they are seen — and seen by God! They took it to him and he was so kind and thankful. He saluted my son and he saluted back and thanked him for his service. I made sure they also said “God bless you” — but he beat them to it! 🙂 They’ll remember that moment much more than a milkshake— and so will he. 💕🙏🏻
I really, really loved reading this tender hearted story. What an impact you made for your kids too (as well as this tired fella). It is much easier to judge than to help…at least that is the risk. But helping doesn’t have to be hard after all!
Thank you for this! It’s so easy to let our awkwardness steal the moment and do nothing. How wonderful when Jesus’ heart wins over our inadequacies. I’m so glad He knows what to do with our meager offerings.
What a great perspective Kelly, “his heart wins over our inadequacies”, love that!